Here we go again… the same old dilemma.
Sarah’s corporate presentations have lacked focus lately, but how can I tell her without coming on too strong?
Sure, I’m her supervisor. But we have a great relationship… is it worth confronting her and risking her trust in me?
Confronting her could change everything. … but something has to change about those presentations.
…. Then again, I am her supervisor – she should expect this kind of feedback from me right? After all, if it were me – I’d want the feedback.
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The fear of confrontation plagues all workplaces – at some point we are all afraid to confront someone with constructive feedback because … well… “What if they don’t like me anymore?” or “It’ll be awkward around that person for weeks.”
Respected business blogger, HR Capitalist, has one thing to say to that: “Man up. Or Woman Up. Give the Feedback.”
LTC agrees, but we don’t want you to have to do it alone.
First, it’s important to keep in mind your role and motive. Your role as a coach is to provide constructive and productive feedback. You are all on the same team and antagonism leads nowhere. Make sure to ask yourself: Are you motivated to help this individual to realize her/his personal and professional development goals? Are your intentions in the best interest of the team member?
And whether you like it or not, giving feedback is going to require you to fight past feelings of insecurity and hesitation. Gone are the days when managers can “wimp out” simply because a conversation might involve some uncomfortable moments. Authentic leaders genuinely care about the individual’s success.
Here are three different but simple suggestions for approaching feedback:
- Tell the employee you thought about avoiding the conversation but instead you thought it would be to their benefit to provide the assessment. Statements such as “If it were me, I’d want to know from someone who can provide an honest assessment” would be appropriate.
- Approach the employee with some positive feedback before launching into the constructive. This isn’t to “fluff them up” so they don’t feel blind-sided by the constructive comments, but rather to show that you have genuinely noticed what they are, in fact, doing well.
- Ask the employee’s permissions for you to give them feedback. The employee may be more likely to listen and respond in a better fashion. It also makes the supervisor more of a team member and less authoritative, allowing communication to flow more naturally.
When you can learn to approach and give feedback in an engaging, constructive and effective way, your employees see you as a leader that can be trusted. The current period of economic recovery offers an important opportunity to assess our coaching and feedback effectiveness, and make some changes. An authentic culture of accountability will be an important competitive advantage when economic recovery is complete. Stay tuned for future blogs on how to navigate through the feedback process itself, once you’re past the initial confrontation.
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
I would say practice first on your family at home. If you can get you children to calmly listen to what you have to say, understand the point you are trying to make, and can give you any positive feedback on your conversation, you’re pretty much ready to take on the world. If not, first try a completely different scenario at work, then go home and fire your kids…